Unpacking the “B” Word

bewbs.   The other day we were standing in a very long checkout line at Sprouts. The little old lady in front of us was talking to the littles as they orbited the shopping cart, then she came close to me, pulled the nursing cover OFF of Eva T and said, “Oh mercy, and what […]

Spanx, But No Spanx

I was invited to attend a meeting as a “mover and shaker” in the realm of social media. I was so honored/terrified. In addition to never finishing my degree, I have also never had a real job. Yes, I know, motherhood is a total real job. My mom pointed out that I am in charge […]

“Hi. My name is Amber and I make jokes when I’m uncomfortable.”

Our closest neighbor just told me about a suspicious vehicle driving around his property. During the course of our conversation he casually mentioned that someone had attempted to break into his home last week. Because I am a super laid back, non-worrying-type human he and I continued to shoot the breeze and swap recipes and […]

What is True

This morning I told the littles we could play hide ‘n’ seek after I got ready for the day. Then I looked in the mirror and began to mentally pick at everything going on there. My clothes are frumpy because my body is frumpy, hormones have me breaking out like a teenager on prom night, […]

THE diaper bag

Eva Tennessee is nearly 6 weeks old and I still don’t have a diaper bag. Ok, fine. I have several diaper bags, but none of them are exactly what I need. Especially at this fourth child stage of the game. I need something that will wipe clean when a 3 year old smells a dirty […]

Can’t Even Right Now/What does that even mean?

Yesterday our new baby, Eva Tennessee, became a week old. And I am a weak old. After a good long night of nursing and about a billion poopy diapers, she and I rolled out of bed at 8:30 to an eerily dark and quiet house. The curtains were all drawn and there was evidence of […]

Birth Story, poops and giggles style

This blog post is brought to you by a lack of sleep. Oh, and chocolate. Today I’m going to share our beautiful birth story. And by beautiful, I mean feral. After spending the morning together, freaking people out all over town telling them that I was past my due date and about to go have […]

I Really Moustache You a Question

‘Member Movember? Well, the firefighter grew a ‘stache for the occasion and decided to  keep it. You know when something new enters your world and you begin to notice it everywhere? I had never really paid attention to the number of men sporting so many different styles of facial hair. If only the story ended […]

Hulk Need New Dishwasher

Apparently I have become freakishly strong. I don’t know when it happened.  But I have the upper body strength of a Russian weightlifter.  It is just hard to tell because it is carefully concealed within the undefined bulk of “mom arms”.  You may think you are witnessing the ebb and flow of flab as I […]

The Flu ‘n’ Stuff

Sorry for the hiatus.  We have been all kinds of busy here.  We hosted Christmas, then I hosted the flu. This year we have caught every sickness that has gone around and have gotten super sick. In fact, if there is even a remote possibility that the Zombie Apocalypse is a real thing, my family […]