In a fit of empowerment (stupidity), I took the kids to the mall. Amelia and Connor sat in the double stroller while Zeke orbited us waving at random strangers, asking for cookies, and dancing to every song everywhere we went. Maroon 5’s “Moves Like Jagger” came on, prompting a particularly spastic flash dance from my child. As I pretended not to know the kid who looks like me and kept calling me “Mom”, I RAN OVER HIS LEG. Not his toe or foot. His leg. Apparently, in Zeke’s world, “moves like Jagger” means: “Lay down in front of double stroller while playing air guitar.”